Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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