i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize