Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize