Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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