ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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