My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
