It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
