She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize