its not stalking. its research.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
