i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
