is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
