I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
