She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Randomize
