"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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