What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
