Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
