all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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