I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
