is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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