also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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