do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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