well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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