Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
