Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
