i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Randomize
