it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
MIDGETS
????
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize