Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
