when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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