Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
