just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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