He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
and you said cock pushups were impossible
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
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