Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
