I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
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