3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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