Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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