i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
