The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
