You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I'm passing your future prison.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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