Having a random hookup so left but love u
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
