Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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