Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
