just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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