I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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