Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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