Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You made out with two different species that night
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
