i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Two words: blizzard sex
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize