do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I can't turn off my feet"
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
