As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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