hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
someone get that fucking seahorse.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
