3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
