so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
