I wanna bring you to show and tell
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I believe in your delicious
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
