Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
